Every founder, leader, sales rep and person on a dating app has heard this.
Why did the Wizard ask Dorothy to bring him the broomstick of the Wicked Witch? It’s not because he needed a broomstick.
It’s because he wanted Dorothy to go away. If you send someone away to get something ungettable, if you articulate a need that violates the rules of physics or possibility, then you’ve said no without saying no.
For his own concealed reasons, he wasn’t sold. It’s usually fear. Fear of the unknown, or fear of going first, or fear of being seen as a fraud. There are lots of reasons we don’t want to fund a company, offer a job, go on a second date or buy something.
But sharing the real objection is painful. It might expose us. We might have the objection ‘overcome’ and then we’re on the hook.
When we ask for a broomstick, we’re sending the well-meaning person on a fruitless mission, hoping that they won’t come back.
When someone asks for a broomstick, the first thing to do is to find enough empathy to imagine why the person actually needs a broomstick. Because sometimes they do (and if that’s the case, it’s not a ‘broomstick objection’ and you should either find new people to call on or fix what you’ve got).
But if they don’t need a broomstick, realize that the only thing you’ve learned is that the person you’re sitting with is afraid of something. For their sake, and yours, it pays to patiently and generously discover what it is.