Most people assume that if they start practicing breathing meditation, mental health problems like anxiety and depression will automatically improve. And for some, that’s exactly what happens. As a meditation teacher, I’ve helped many people reduce their symptoms with breathwork. But for others, it’s much less effective. In fact, some people even feel worse when they sit with their eyes closed, focusing on their breath.
If meditation hasn’t worked for you yet, I get your frustration. You were told mindfulness would ease your anxiety and depression, you’ve been practicing daily, and it just isn’t working. It’s infuriating. What gives?
The truth is, you’ve likely fallen into a common beginner’s trap: believing meditation is as simple as sitting quietly and focusing on your breath. Yes, you can relieve anxiety and depression with meditation. I’ve helped many people do just that. But before you experience a breakthrough, you might need to change your perspective on meditation a little bit. Let me show you how.
A Better Understanding of Meditation, Anxiety, & Depression
Many people think meditation is just sitting with your eyes closed and focusing on your breath. But that’s not true. Meditation is about two key processes:
- Becoming more aware of something, like your breath, love and kindness, or gratitude.
- Learning to be less affected by thoughts, feelings, physical sensations, and external stimuli.
For example, in mindful breathing, you focus on the breath while letting thoughts and feelings pass by without affecting you.
Anxiety and depression work similarly. Both are shaped by what you focus on and what you allow to affect you. For instance, when grieving, you might be hyper-aware of upsetting thoughts about your loss, thoughtd that heavily affect you. Or with depression, you might feel a heavy weight in your chest and fixate on that sensation, letting it drain your energy.
As well as focusing on negative thoughts and feelings, you also actively stop any positive thoughts or feelings. After losing someone, for example, you might feel guilty for any positive emotion, thinking, “I don’t deserve to be happy.” This skews your perception of reality toward the negative, amplifying your emotional pain.
Meditation can help. In meditation we control what we focus on and what we allow to affect us. But not if you do your plain old breathing meditation.
Making Meditation Work For You
To make meditation work for anxiety and depression, you need to control what you focus on and what affects you. For instance, if you’re hyper-focused on problems, use meditation to redirect your attention to something positive. This simple switch in perspective will make all the difference.
I’ve seen many examples of this. When I struggled with anxiety, I was fixated on my health, worrying every sensation was a sign of illness. But then I forced myself to meditate on healthiness, switching my mindset from one in which I was hyperfocused on possible ways I might be sick to being grateful for the ways I was healthy. Another example. A student of mine was obsessed with the idea of her boyfriend cheating on her. She would allow visions of infidelity to haunt her. Together we meditated on faithfulness and she learned to open her eyes (and heart) to the signs that her boyfriend was faithful. It made her feel so much better, and it greatly strengthened their relationship.
Meditation Exercise
- Write It Down Start by writing down what you’re currently focusing on or what’s affecting you. Be honest and clear about your feelings or thoughts.
- Focus on the Opposite: Now, shift your focus to the opposite of what you wrote. For example: If loneliness is overwhelming you, meditate on love and connection. If stress is consuming you, visualize the calm of nature. If judgment is clouding your mind, focus on kindness and acceptance.
- Let Go of Resistance: As you meditate, your mind may bring up contradictory thoughts or feelings. This is completely normal. When this happens, simply recognize them as just thoughts, not your reality.
- Allow Thoughts to Pass: Let any distractions pass by without attaching to them. Gently return to your meditation focus, breathing deeply and staying present in the opposite energy you want to cultivate.
- Finish with Compassion: End your meditation with a moment of self-compassion, acknowledging your effort and any progress you’ve made in shifting your mindset.
The Science
Our state of mind shapes our focus. Depression often makes us focus on losses or failures, while anxiety zeroes in on stressors or dangers [1]. This skewed focus tilts our perception of reality, making the world seem more negative than it is.
Research shows we can reduce the influence of negative thoughts and feelings by labeling them. This activates the rational prefrontal cortex and reduces activity in the emotional amygdala. [2]
Focusing on the opposite of habitual negative thoughts also improves mental health. For example, meditating on love and connection instead of loneliness or on gratitude instead of stress can reduce emotional pain and rewire the brain over time.
This approach helps loosen the grip of negativity and builds emotional resilience, making it easier to shift focus toward the positive. So, what’s troubling you? Name it, explore its opposite, and let meditation guide you toward healing.
If you’d like help with this process, book a meditation session with me, and we’ll work through it together.
Paul Harrison is a meditation teacher with 20+ years of experience and a deep passion for helping others. Known for his empathy and authentic approach, he’s dedicated to guiding individuals and teams toward mindfulness, clarity, and well-being.