Er, Helldivers 2 folks, you might want to start emplying some of the more dramatic post-Liberty Day hangover abatement techniques in your arsenal, if you’re still suffering from the effects of freedom overindulgence. Why? Because Arrowhead’s just dropped a fresh Major Order and it looks pretty damn tough.
Yep, after granting everyone some nice free time to try and stab tanks to death with the new Constitution rifle over the weekend, after they dealt with the Jet Brigade and having to choose between two things in the last couple of MOs, playtime’s been brought to a close by J.O.E.L and co.
“With another Liberty Day behind us, and an appropriate appreciation of the great gift of Managed Democracy sufficiently honored, we once again return to the Galactic War,” thist latest order from Arrowhead reads, “Multiple strategic priorities have arisen, all of high priority:”
- “Decryption of confidential data recovered from Automaton Strongholds has identified a high-security database, thought to contain key intel regarding the Jet Brigade.”
- “Simultaneously, recent Terminid activity has exposed the Terminid Research Preserve to threat of external disruption. This security breach must be rectified immediately.”
- “Finally, we have reason to believe the Automatons are planning an imminent territorial expansion. We cannot allow the Automatons to expand their territory further.”
And yup, in case you missed the end of that second line and now thinking, ‘ooh, I wonder which single one of those we, the community, will pick to go for’, the studio emphasised: “The Helldivers are ordered to achieve success on all three of these objectives.” Talk about easing folks back onto the coal face after the hols, eh?
So, you need to get out there are use the three pairs of hands Arrowhead seems to think you have to libreate Mater Bay, hold onto both Gacrux and Pandion-XXIV, and casually defend five planets. As one player on Reddit’s put it: “We are so fucked…”
But, damn it, that’s not attitude for a space soldier to have, so I guess just give it your best shot. A playlist of cheesy motivational pop from the early 2000s might help. You heard me, and I don’t say this f**king lightly: break out the S Club 7!