The holiday season can be a particularly stressful time for job seekers—especially for those currently between gigs (let’s not call it unemployed). While this season is meant for celebration, it often brings uncomfortable conversations with well-meaning but misguided family members.


You know the drill: someone inevitably asks, “How’s your job search going?” or “Where are you with your job search?”

Family and friends also tend to give a lot of really horrible, unsolicited advice on how to look for a job:

  • “Well, you should walk right in and knock on doors.”
  • “Are you sending out 100 applications a day?”

Let’s be honest: these suggestions are outdated and ineffective. Most of the people offering this advice probably haven’t looked for a job in decades. While their intentions are good, the reality is they’re causing you unnecessary stress.

As someone who has coached countless professionals through the ups and downs of the job search process, here’s my advice…

Set Boundaries With Your Family During The Holidays

It’s important for you to set boundaries with family, friends, and anyone else in your life who is bound to ask about your job search. People have to understand that they are overstepping and being inappropriate.

When someone brings up your job search, you can kindly redirect the conversation with a response like this:

“Thank you so much for thinking of me. I promise you, my job search is under control, and I’m taking a well-deserved day off to celebrate with family today. Let’s talk about something else—I’d love to hear how you’re doing!”

By setting boundaries, you’re shutting them down. You’re letting them know you appreciate their kind thoughts, but you’re not going there today.

Why Boundaries Matter

Woman hugs a family member at a partyBigstock

It’s essential to teach people how to treat you. If you allow intrusive questions or unsolicited advice to dominate the conversation, it will only add to your stress. Setting boundaries communicates that such comments are inappropriate while maintaining a positive tone.

To ensure you’re ready for these moments, rehearse your response. Practice it in front of a mirror, making sure to smile so you don’t come across as angry or defensive. If someone persists or starts offering advice after you’ve set boundaries, feel free to gently say:

“I really don’t feel like talking about this right now. I’m just trying to enjoy my day.”

And if the person continues to push? Politely excuse yourself from the conversation. We’ve got to learn to stand up for ourselves.

The holidays can be tough, but you don’t have to face them alone. With the right mindset and strategies, you can maintain your confidence and focus during your job search.

If you’d like help with your job search, visit Work It DAILY and sign up for a 7-day free trial. Let’s navigate this season together! Support, advice, and positivity are just a click away.

Good luck, and here’s to a joyful, stress-free holiday season!

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