So you’ve been practicing meditation for a while now and it’s going great. Just one problem. How can you meditate on the go? Because sure, being able to relax when you’re home alone is fine and dandy, but you can’t sit with your eyes closed for 20 minutes if you’re at work or out with friends or, well, doing just about anything. So what are you supposed to do?
In my meditation lessons I often advise my clients to do one proper meditation session per day and to use some quick mindfulness exercises when they are out and about, as a way to quickly reduce stress and regulate emotions. There are very many different mindfulness exercises and each of them helps in different ways. That’s why, if you’re one of my clients, we’ll do a session together in which I help you to find the perfect exercises based on your individual needs.
There are, however, some mindfulness exercises that are just universally good for everyone. And so I’m creating this guide to show you some of the best mindfulness exercises for emotional regulation. Many of these are derived from DBT and are especially good for people with BPD.
Use These Mindfulness Exercises To Regulate Emotions
Here are techniques you can use anytime, anywhere—even in public.
1. 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding
Name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste.
This grounding exercise only takes a minute and instantly focuses your mind on the present. It activates your parasympathetic nervous system, promoting relaxation, and interrupts anxious thoughts by forcing your brain to label objects. It’s a quick and effective way to calm your emotions.
2. Easy Breathwork
I’ve previously created guides to the best breathing techniques. Breathwork is effective because it regulates the nervous system, promotes relaxation, and enhances oxygen intake, improving brain function and energy. It also helps manage emotions, reduces stress, and supports mindfulness by focusing attention on the present. Additionally, breathwork stimulates the vagus nerve, balances CO2 and O2 levels, and releases emotional blockages, making it a powerful tool for overall well-being.
There are many different types of breathwork, but the one that my clients and I have found most useful is Box Breathing. Simply breathe in for four, hold for four, breathe our for four, hold for four, and repeat. This is a quick and easy mindfulness exercise for relaxation and you can do it anyplace, anytime. It’s even more effective if you make a subtle sighing sound on the exhale.
3: Simple Stretching
Simple stretches are effective for emotional regulation because they help release physical tension, which can ease mental stress. Stretching promotes the release of endorphins, improving mood and reducing feelings of anxiety or frustration. By focusing on the breath and body, stretching also encourages mindfulness, grounding you in the present moment. The combination of physical relaxation and mental focus helps restore emotional balance and promote overall well-being.
There are many simple stretches that you can use. Some of the best are:
- Neck Rolls – Helps release neck and shoulder tension, reducing stress and promoting relaxation.
- Shoulder Shrugs – Relieves tightness in the shoulders, aiding in stress release and emotional balance.
- Seated Cat-Cow Stretch –Sit up straight, place your hands on your knees, inhale as you arch your back and lift your chest, then exhale as you round your back and tuck your chin. Repeat slowly. This improves posture and encourages deep breathing, calming the mind.
- Wrist and Finger Stretch – Eases tension in the hands and wrists, promoting relaxation and focus.
- Seated Spinal Twist – Sit up straight, twist your torso to one side while keeping your hips forward, then return to center. Repeat on the other side. Releases tension in the back and helps improve focus, supporting emotional clarity.
4: Holding Palms Upwards
I’ve discovered that my state of mind is very quickly communicated via my hand and finger positions. If I’m very relaxed my hands will be flat (ish) and my fingers gently extended. When I’m experiencing any kind of negative emotions there will be tension in my hands and fingers in different ways. For instance if I’m angry I’ll clench a fist, if I’m stressed my fingers will curl back in on themselves as though scratching my palm, and if I’m sad all my fingers and my thumbs will be tucked inward as though hiding from the world. This happens because there is a strong connection between the brain’s emotional processing areas and motor control systems. We can take advantage of this by deliberately putting our hands and fingers in specific positions.
When you want to relax, rest your hands on your thighs, palms facing up, and gently touch the tips of your thumb and index finger together while keeping the other fingers extended. This position promotes openness and receptivity, balances energy, fosters relaxation, and deepens mindfulness.
5: Visualizing your safe space
If you’ve been following me on here or Youtube you’ve probably noticed that I do a lot of visualization meditations. The reason is that when you fill your mind with visions of relaxing spaces, you create little safe havens that you can go to anytime you want.
Visualizing relaxing scenes helps by engaging the mind with positive imagery, which activates the parasympathetic nervous system, promoting relaxation. It shifts focus away from stressors, calming the body and mind. The brain doesn’t distinguish between real and vividly imagined experiences, so imagining peaceful environments can reduce anxiety, lower heart rate, and ease muscle tension. Plus it encourages mindfulness, improves emotional regulation, and creates a deeper sense of calm and well-being.
Some of the best things to visualize are:
- The ocean
- A peaceful park
- Being with loved ones
- Imagine viewing Earth from space
6: Give someone a compliment
Giving someone a compliment helps with emotional regulation because it shifts your focus to something positive. When you compliment someone, your brain releases feel-good chemicals like dopamine, which can help calm your mind. It also boosts your sense of connection with others, making you feel supported. Plus, expressing gratitude and kindness can help you manage your emotions by creating a more relaxed, positive atmosphere for both you and the other person. It doesn’t matter who you compliment either. See someone walking past with a great t-shirt? Tell them! It’ll make both of you feel good!
7: Cold Exposure
Exposure to cold activates the mammalian dive reflex, which is a natural response that helps calm the body. When you touch something cold, it triggers this reflex, slowing your heart rate, lowering blood pressure, and promoting a sense of calm. This response is part of the body’s built-in mechanisms for handling stress and can help regulate emotions by calming the nervous system and grounding you in the present moment.
When you find yourself stressed or becoming emotional, excuse yourself and visit the washroom. Now run the cold tap until it’s properly cold, and hold your hand under it for 60 seconds. This will be enough to activate your mammalian reflex so you relax.
8: Fix your gaze
One of my personal favorite Meditation techniques is Tratika, otherwise called Candle Gazing. In this meditation, we hold our gaze fixed still on an object in front of us. This calms the mind because of a link between the eyes and the brain. Essentially, when we hold our gaze still it reduces neural activity and balances brain hemispheres. This in turn helps to balance the Rational / Reasonable mind with the emotional mind, creating more mental stability. It is also very easy to do wherever you happen to be. Let’s say, just for example, that you’re on a date at a restaurant. Suddenly you feel a little bit anxious. Well, you can pause for a moment and just look straight ahead at a wall. Simply hold your gaze still for ten seconds, and this will calm your mind. It’s very subtle so the other person probably won’t even notice what you’re doing.
9: Find evidence for calmness
This is my very favorite exercise on this list. And it’s something that I do pretty much everyday. In this technique, we basically look for evidence that everything is fine and that we can be calm. When you have a bad thought and you start to feel very stressed what normally happens is that the mind looks for reasons why you are stressed, and that just makes things worse. To flip that on its head, what we want to do is deliberately look for evidence that all is fine. So for instance let’s say you are at work and suddenly you feel stressed. Stop. Look for the evidence that all is fine. Oh, my office is exactly how it always is. It looks the same and I’m with people that are very familiar to me. I’m just sitting in an office chair. All is well… And so all we are basically doing is just scanning the environment for signs that actually everything is fine. By making yourself look for evidence that all is fine, you switch your mindset from one of stress and panic to one in which you’re focusing on all the things that are fine with the world.
Summary
There are many different mindfulness exercises for emotional regulation. You will find that, as an individual, some of them work better for you than others. Above I’ve shared the exercises that I find universally helpful for most people. And I do hope that you benefit from them. However, this is just the beginning. If you truly want to master your emotions and to have the control to calm yourself anytime you need to, then book a private meditation lesson with me. I will reveal to you the tricks and exercises that will work for you based on your individual personality and your unique goals.
Paul Harrison is a meditation teacher with 20+ years of experience and a deep passion for helping others. Known for his empathy and authentic approach, he’s dedicated to guiding individuals and teams toward mindfulness, clarity, and well-being.